I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize