Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
