i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
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