Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
