Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
