Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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