i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize