He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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