i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
