its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Randomize
