I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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