If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
