My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
