Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I just googled if crying burns calories
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
