R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
