it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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