so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
