ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
