Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
That accounts for only three of the penises
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Randomize
