I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
