let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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