Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
