Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
