HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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