i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
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