Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Everyone says I win the strip club
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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