Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Randomize
