oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
