im drinking this country out of the recession.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize