Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Randomize