two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
