we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize
