I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
no, he came in my armpit
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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