shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize
