just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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