i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Randomize
