What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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