I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
zippers are such a cool invention
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
