im gay
i know
yea but for you.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
