Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
