U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
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