Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
