in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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