Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
