i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
