Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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