dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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