Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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