omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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