Please, let me fuck your mom
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize